My most recent entry (“Tea For Me, Please”, also my only entry prior to this) was a bit rushed (despite its epic length), and for this I apologize. With my hands in several other cookie jars and a recurring attention deficit, I eventually decided that it was better to just “put something out there” rather than continue on in seemingly endless revisions. Truth be known, I was tempted to abandon the particular piece altogether…not for lack of passion concerning the topic, but because I had such difficulty with what I wanted to say, and how I wanted to say it.
But as I considered whether or not to abort (or terminate, si vous préférez) the rant in question, the temptation increased further due to a recent news article that I simply could not allow to pass.
Prior to indulging myself, however, it occurs to me that I have not yet even bothered to thank the host(s) of P+P (as well as the readers, both the kind and not-so-kind) for allowing me the opportunity to post here, a rudeness on my part that shall here be remedied. Thank you. And with that said, I hope to set about the business of testing the strengths of that invitation by injecting uncomfortable doses of reality and sound opinion into the highly sensitive cavities of that group to which I belong: Wiccans.
It appears that the past season (Samhain, or Halloween for the lesser folk) has given rise yet again to an opportunity to get our knickers in a twist, as it were. We excel at this. It comes with the athame and the triple goddess tiara.
Port Brewing Company, a San Marcos, California brewing company specializing in what appears to be unique beers with humorous motifs, has now provoked the ire of some in the Wiccan community by producing and marketing the “Witch’s Wit.” An alcoholic concoction seasoned with honey/coriander/orange & grapefruit peels, the beer comes as one of many thematic drinks in the line of Lost Abbey beers. This one, however, depicts on its label an illustration of a woman burning at the stake (thus the “witch” hook) in the midst of what I suppose some would think of as a clamoring throng of Christians. Most likely Republican Christians at that. And Bush is probably amongst them, with Cheney pulling the strings.
Wasting space clarifying the obvious, what has this group of persons in stitches is the notion that a “hate crime” has been committed here, or at the very least gross insensitivity. Vicki Noble, described as a feminist Shamanic healer (natch) and professor at the Institute of Transpersonal Psychology, started the campaign with an email to her followers asking “Can we stop this brewer from their hate imagery?”
It goes without saying that these days the mere whispers can provoke action on the part of activist hearts sans reason. Hell, it’s part and parcel of our chronically imbalanced sub-culture…we have to blow some things way out of proportion, all to ensure the correct manifesting of this Age of Aquarius ™ , or some such thing. But really, “hate imagery?” Is this supposed to be taken seriously?
Apparently so, because without missing a beat, similarities were drawn between “the burning times” and both the holocaust and the lynching of blacks. Of course they were. It simply would not do for those “empowered” chronic victims amongst us to allow such a golden opportunity to pass, now would it? And hey, this could plausibly lay the groundwork for Wiccans to seek reparations for the Burning Times. Woot! Party at Ravens house (pick your Raven…)!
Here’s the thought process, in a nutshell (which is far more than required to house it): Depicting a burning witch is a flagrant offense demonstrating utter contempt for and/or unacceptable insensitivity towards modern day witches, i.e., Wiccans. There are so many problems with this emotional blitzkrieg and deficit of reason that I hardly know where to start.
It is almost painful to think that this Pagan leader’s opinion actually represents what some of think on this matter…in fact, probably a lot of us. It likewise bothers me that she could have the audacity to compare the burning times with the holocaust. Were a lot of people killed in both of these historically tragic times (although if we want to compare numbers, I am afraid that “we” come up very short…except for the “nine million truthers”)? Sure. But that is where the similarities end. Jews were slaughtered wholesale out of the hatred of bigotry towards a specific socio-religious ethnic group. “Witches,” however, were killed for more directly socio-political reasons, particularly at the local level where individual accusers had some stake in the removal of the accused. What cannot be said is that this was a form of genuine religious bigotry. It was instead an instance when politics and hysteria were masked under the guise of religious piety; where “Christian” lawmen executed victims who were overwhelmingly….wait for it…Christians. Well, how about that? My ancient Wiccan ancestors (who definitely preceded Gardner) were actually Christians…now ain’t that something else?
The real offense committed here is the attempt to ride the coat-tails of these actual victims. The number of incidents in which the victim was actually something that could be remotely construed as a “witch” are extremely rare overall. We should know this, because we strain to use each and every remote example as if it were indicative of the whole. If you want to lay claim to this horrific tragedy as part of your religious heritage, then you can only legitimately do so as a Christian. And even then you have to confront the real nature of this historical anomaly, that it is more a warning against both the mixture of politics and religion and the abuse of political power (through unjust law) than it is of any religious discrimination.
This should provoke yet another thought, while we are struggling to draw false comparisons. This concerns the similarities that may or may not exist between modern day witches and their alleged historical forbears, in this case those existing during the 16th century. Wicca, and indeed the overwhelming majority of neo-pagan traditions, is at best inspired by and very loosely modeled upon imagery and all but non-existent historical records of previous beliefs and practices. To draw such strict comparisons with those who went before us, sharing little else but the title of “witch,” is to stretch credulity. Even if it were the case that those burned at the stake were in fact religious martyrs, we could not seriously describe them as members of an ancient line of nature-based goddess worshiping religionists…at the very least not in any way even remotely resembling the hyper-political packaging which for many defines Wicca today.
Reality check: We have only very loose associations with traditional witches (the genuine articles of old, not “Trad” Witches of today) of any sort. Co-opting and promoting the false history that the burning times were a persecution of witches is a form intellectual suicide…one that serves us poorly. Portraying Wiccans as sufferers of the same persecution greatly insults those who were the real victims, as well as those more simply afflicted with common sense.
Consider Cynthia Eller, associate professor of women’s studies at Montclair State University and author of The Myth of Matriarchal Prehistory (required reading, IMNSHO), who immediately jumped aboard this bandwagon. Railing that the label is just plain offensive, she notes that the woman pictured could have been her “great, great, great, great grandmother…” Indeed, she could have, provided that she is herself an artists rendering, or a cartoon rather than a real person.
But the real kicker is when she reveals the true motives in play by this wicked brewing company; the perpetuation of misogyny. Yes, I am again unfortunately serious. So it’s a good thing that she told me what was going on here, because for the life of me, I simply would never have interpreted this cartoon as veiled hatred for women (or is it womyn? I’m just so out of touch these days…)
Witch’s Wit is part of a line of beverages that deal with religious irony. To date, we Wiccans are the only group that have taken them to task with any sense of indignation. That says something about us, I would think. But unlike some others, I have somehow managed to have a much different reaction to the image presented. Rather than being stigmatized by the fate of this feminist every-woman (i.e., witch) depicted, with whom I guess I am supposed to imagine some kinship, I instead reflect on the nature of the unquestioning mob mentality. In the case of the image proper, I wonder how it is that a peoples could allow these atrocities to occur in the first place, much less become chanting proponents of such horrifics. Where was reason and civility? And then I draw my own ironic parallel with these activist objectors, who seem to lack the very same abilities of reason and reflection, and yes, sometimes even civility, that to me characterize the mob on the label they decry. Also absent seems to be any ability to appreciate the almost comedic sense of irony which was clearly intended, particularly when one contrasts the picture with the accompanying write-up.
Lighten up. Or is that “mirth” thing only referring to when Jon Stewart or Steven Colbert take cheap swipes at conservative X?
In this instance, however, we are once again treated to outrage against the “patriarchal system” and pleas to fight against the “persecution” of Wiccans…a travesty well documented (or at least advertised) by followers of thealogy. Needless to say, as a Wiccan I find myself in the unenviable position of once again being thoroughly embarrassed for the company I grudgingly keep. It occurs to me that we live in a particularly cozy age if this is all it takes to get our collective panties in a wad. If this is the best we’ve got, life must be pretty grand.
To summarize: Wiccans are not the traditional witches of old. Never have been, most likely never will be. Let’s stop pretending that we are the same as they, it is insulting to both parties. Secondly, those who suffered during the 16th century as “witches” were almost exclusively no such thing. To piggy-back on their suffering is quite pathetic, and others see it. Thirdly, can we finally make some attempt to get over this humiliating compulsion to inject victimhood, particularly of the feminist stripe, into virtually anything and everything? Chronic complaining and pounding the hell out of everyone with imaginative histories has long been tiring, wearing out its welcome some time ago. And lastly, it’s a beer bottle label, for mercy’s sake. Can anyone in their right mind actually believe that this company had intent to insult or discriminate against any person or persons? Remember folks, Wiccans are on the whole an unknown quantity to the greater masses. We are taken about as seriously as, oh say, Jedi. Much of this is our own fault. And let us remember, the traditional imagery of witches and witchcraft is public domain, not owned wholesale by every ”special” person with a metaphysical shop to hang a shingle on.
My point, in an overdue closing, is that this is precisely the nonsense that makes us all look bad. In my own experience, I have always had one of two responses whenever I elect to reveal my occult religious proclivities; either that clueless look of “what the hell is Wicca?” (which is quite reasonable), or the other look of “oh, you’re one of those fruits…”. It is stuff like this latest stink that give us the latter reputation. Pentacles on headstones…sure, let’s fight that fight. Personal anguish over perceived discrimination in a beer bottle cartoon, particularly when it factually has nothing to do with Wicca (or the current “patriarchy”)? Some of us need to get a life. Or better yet, some of us need to stop allowing these types to speak for us.
That said, I gotta see if I can have some of this Witch’s Wit shipped up here to Canada (where it’s colder than a witch’s…er, well…). Perhaps after partaking in a little consciousness altering of my own, this lil’ witch can reckon how it is that so many others are completely witless.
Blessed be.





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